Thursday, January 31, 2013

Rural Jurors, Mystic Pizzas, and Werewolf Bar Mitzvahs

By all accounts, today's Report should start in October 11, 2006, when Tina Fey's Liz Lemon bought hot dogs for everyone in New York in the 30 Rock premiere.  But it doesn't.  Because, like so many college kids, I was late to the party.

Instead, it starts four years and eleven months ago, in the end of February 2008, in the office of my Intro to Film professor, asking for some guidance on my paper on Hitchcock's Notorious, but also for advice on a birthday gift for my roommate Andrew (among our subscribers!).  I explained to her that we had just watched and loved Arrested Development, so a season of a similar show would be good.  (Netflix streaming hadn't really taken off yet...)  She recommended 30 Rock, if he hadn't already seen it.  I told her I hadn't seen it, and I was told to leave her office and not come back until I had watched the first several episodes.  A few hours later, I was wrapping a gift purchased at a now extinct mall, and a few days later I began my weird relationship with Liz Lemon, Jack Donaghy, Kenneth Parcell, and all the rest of the 30 Rock gang.


It hasn't been a steady relationship... After the rapid binge consumption of the first season, Andrew and I worked our way toward catching up on the second.  Eventually, we were watching in real time, or at the very least day-after-Hulu-time.  And for a year or so, that's how it was with me and 30 Rock.  But eventually I lost track of the gang at TGS, and stopped watching for a few months, only to binge on Hulu or Netflix, consuming four, five, six episodes at a time.  Still, I watched and loved every episode of the quirky comedy, some more than others, so I find myself watching the final episode a bit mournfully, but glad that it won't be driven into the ground like some NBC shows wrapping up this year.

With its references, quirks, absurd antics, and hilarious celebrity cameos, the show is much loved by the Internet community, and lots of sites are compiling lists and reflections on its seven seasons.  A.V. Club suggests ten episodes that best demonstrate how 30 Rock changed the sitcom landscape, while Buzzfeed does its thing with lists of the 30 best jokes and the 50 most important lessons of the show (though they somehow forget Jenna's classic "We're all models west of the Allegheny).  Vulture gets creative by putting together nine classic jokes as infographics, then goes on to nail it with its top ten episodes, identifying "Tracy Does Conan" as the best episode.

For those who don't remember what happens from episode title to episode title, let me list some highlights that prove that this first season episode is the best of the series:  A flashback in which Tracy attacks Conan as a "stabbing robot;" Rachel Dratch's cameo (one of many) when Tracy hallucinates alittle blue dude; Jack coining the term "mind-grapes," which Tracy then casually uses; Dr. Leo 'Medicine's Not A Science' Spaceman's his first appearance; an allusion to Liz's past relationship with Conan O'Brien; Kenneth's battle with four Rite-Drugs at the same intersection; Jenna promo-ing her completely unpronounceable film "The Rural Juror;" an appearance by Aubrey Plaza; and Jack delivering his best line of the series.

And speaking of "The Rural Juror," references to fictional films, television shows, and songs are what I'll always most fondly remember about the show.  They're collected here, but I've listed my top ten below:

10. Los Amantes Clandestinos -- The Puerto Rican soap opera featuring a villain that bears an uncanny resemblance to Jack
9. Homonym -- The gameshow where it's always the other one.
8. Martin Luther King Day -- The star-filled hit from the maker of Valentine's Day and New Year's Eve earns bonus points for featuring clips from Love, Actually, too.
7. Bitch Hunter -- Will Ferrell's wildly offensive show is exactly what it sounds like, and is the reason Liz got to produce The Girlie Show
6. MILF Island -- The Survivor parody featured the tagline: "25 Superhot Moms, 50 eighth grade boys, no rules."
5. Gold Case -- Deal or No Deal meets Millionaire.  But gold's real heavy...
4. Mystic Pizza, the Musical -- "When life keeps handing you anchovies, just cover them up with some extra cheese and make a pizza, life is a pizza..."
3. Werewolf Bar Mitzvah -- "Spooky, scary, boys becoming men, men becoming wolves..."
2. The Rural Juror -- The true story of Rory Journer, whose pure furor endures a terrible murder
1. The Girlie Show with Tracy Jordan -- The show that brought the 30 Rock cast together for seven seasons of quality comedy, coming back for one final episode in the series finale.

And now I'm working on my night cheese halfway through the finale of one of my favorite real TV shows, saying goodbye to Jack, Liz, Tracy, Jenna, Kenneth, Pete, and the gang.  But only after having earlier revisited that first behind the scenes look at The Girlie Show.

It wasn't HBO.  It was TV.  And I loved every episode.

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